Sometimes after the selection, when a couple is passed over by a birth mother, couples ask me if there is anything they can do differently. They have been waiting so long…. Is their profile not complete enough? Do they not have enough pictures? Do they not say enough about themselves?
What I say to them, and to you, if you have been waiting, longing for a child, and feel as though you are never going to see that dream happen, is the following.
Your profile is GREAT. Your pictures are wonderful. Your narrative makes every person who reads it want to be part of your family. So stop worrying about that part of the selection process. A birth mom may say that she is looking for a particular situation – no children, more than one child, biracial, Caucasian only, outside your state, inside your state – whatever those criteria may be, she can articulate them. There are other qualities she may not even be able to identify in her own mind that that make up the selection process as well. You never know what part of your story is going to resonate with a birth mom. It may be that you live in the mountains, or the types of pets you have (or don’t), it may be something you say about how you grew up. The possibilities are endless, and unascertainable. So stop worrying, and PRAY. Pray for the women who are in crisis pregnancies. Pray for the women who are scared and broke and cannot feed another mouth. Pray for the women who have been dumped by yet another guy who said he loved her and wanted to marry her, only to leave her when she told him she was pregnant. Pray for the women bound by addiction and Trust God, that He will bring you the child you were meant to have. And He will.